How to Talk to a Loved One About Mental Health Counseling

Image Credit Steven Coffey

Approaching conversations about mental health counseling with a loved one can sometimes feel nerve-wrecking; the fear of saying the “wrong thing” or unintentionally offending them often creates hesitation, but starting these conversations is essential for breaking the stigma around mental health and offering meaningful support to our loved ones.

Here, we’ll explore how to approach these discussions with compassion, patience, and understanding to create a safe space for your loved one to consider counseling.

Why Talking About Mental Health Counseling Matters

Mental health counseling is a powerful tool for those struggling with mental health challenges. Yet, stigma and misunderstandings about mental health and therapy often create barriers to seeking help.

According to the National Alliance on Mental Illness (NAMI), 1 in 5 adults in the U.S. experienced mental illness in 2019, and 1 in 20 experienced serious mental illness. Among children aged 3-17, 7.1% have an anxiety diagnosis, and 3.2% live with depression (CDC, 2021).

These numbers highlight how common mental health challenges are, yet the stigma surrounding therapy and mental health persists. Normalizing conversations about counseling can help break down these barriers and create a supportive environment for your loved one to take the first step toward healing. In doing so, they may inspire another person to seek support through therapy as well; this ripple effect can truly transform the way we view and treat mental health.

How to Approach the Conversation

If you’re wondering how to bring up counseling with someone you care about, here are a few practical tips to get started:

1. Start with Empathy

Begin the conversation with compassion. Instead of making assumptions or accusations, use “I” statements to express your concern.

For example:

“I didn’t see you at practice this week and I’ve tried to call to catch up, how are you doing?”

“I’ve noticed you’ve been feeling overwhelmed lately. Have you thought about talking to someone who can help?”

“I care about you and want you to feel supported. I’ve heard there are so many benefits to talk therapy and it’s neat that anyone can go.”

These statements help to show you care and are concerned without extending judgment.

2. Practice Active Listening

Once you’ve initiated the conversation, let your loved one guide it. Avoid interrupting or rushing to offer solutions. Instead, focus on truly hearing their thoughts and feelings.

Some validating responses include:

“That sounds really difficult.”

“I’m glad you told me. I’m here to support you.”

Active listening demonstrates that you value their perspective and creates a safe space for open dialogue.

3. Address Misconceptions About Therapy

Your loved one might have reservations about counseling. This is common. They may fear being judged or think therapy is only for specific, or more “severe” cases. Reassure them that counseling is a supportive, judgment-free space where they can work through their feelings and develop helpful coping strategies. A counselor or therapist will work alongside them to identify goals and develop a treatment plan.

Sharing facts about therapy—such as its focus on goal-setting, self-care, and personal growth—can help alleviate their concerns.

Other Helpful Phrases Might Include:

“You don’t have to go through this alone. Therapy can help.”

“I think it’s brave to talk to someone about what you’re feeling.”

“It’s okay to not have all the answers right now.”

“I’m here to help you figure out the next steps.”

Even well-meaning comments can unintentionally minimize your loved ones’ experience. Stick to empathetic, supportive language and use active listening skills throughout the conversation.

Actionable Ways to Support Your Loved One

Offer Practical Help

If your loved one seems overwhelmed, simple gestures can make a big difference. You could say:

“Would you like me to help research therapists with you?”

“I can drive you to your first appointment if you’re nervous.”

“Want to grab coffee afterward and talk about how it went?”

These actions show you’re invested in their well-being.

Normalize the Experience

Reassure your loved one that seeking therapy is a sign of strength, not weakness. Share examples of how therapy has helped others (without oversharing) or, if comfortable, your own experiences, too.

Follow Up Regularly

Support doesn’t end after the first conversation. Check in periodically with questions like:

“How are you feeling about starting counseling?”

“Have you found a therapist you feel comfortable with?”

Consistency demonstrates that your support is ongoing, not fleeting.

Encouraging Counseling for Children and Teens

When discussing therapy with teenagers, it’s essential to approach the topic with an appropriate age awareness.

Here are a few strategies tailored to younger individuals:

·       Use Age-Appropriate Language: Explain therapy as a safe space where they can talk about their feelings and learn ways to feel better.

·       Choose a Comfortable Setting: Have the conversation in a relaxed, neutral spot like their favorite park or during a shared activity.

·       Empower Their Choices: Let them know therapy is about them and their comfort, giving them a sense of control over the process.

Taking Care of Yourself

Supporting a loved one through their mental health journey can be emotionally taxing. Ensure you prioritize your own well-being, too, by:

·       Setting boundaries around your availability.

·       Seeking support from friends, family, or a counselor of your own.

·       Practicing self-care to recharge emotionally and mentally.

Remember, you can’t pour from an empty cup and your wellbeing is vital. If you notice an increase in stress or disruption to your daily life, such as becoming hyper-focused on your loved ones’ mental health journey, it may be a sign to take a step back and re-center. This doesn’t mean that you can no longer support your loved one but ensure you first care for yourself.

For Those Opening Up About Counseling

If you’re considering therapy, know this: you are not alone. Whether you’re confiding in a loved one or reaching out to a professional, your feelings are valid, and help is available.

It’s okay to take your time exploring the idea of counseling. The most important step is starting the conversation—whether with a trusted friend, family member, or mental health professional.

Final Thoughts

Talking about mental health counseling doesn’t require perfect words or a professional title. It simply requires empathy, patience, and the willingness to show up for the people you care about. By fostering open conversations about therapy, we can help normalize mental health care and support our loved ones on their journey to healing.

  Our compassionate therapists would love to support your and your loved one on your mental health journey. We are always accepting new clients in Colorado both in person in Lakewood or Colorado Springs, or virtually throughout the state. Reach out to our friendly intake coordinator to get started.

References

·       National Alliance on Mental Illness. (n.d.). Mental health by the numbers. Retrieved from https://www.nami.org/about-mental-illness/mental-health-by-the-numbers/

·       Mental Health Foundation. (n.d.). How to support someone with a mental health problem. Retrieved from https://www.mentalhealth.org.uk/explore-mental-health/articles/how-support-someone-mental-health-problem

·       National Alliance on Mental Illness. (n.d.). Talking about mental illness: Reaching in. Retrieved from https://www.nami.org/stigma/talking-about-mental-illness-reaching-in/

·       Mayo Clinic. (n.d.). Mental health: Maintaining mental wellness. Retrieved from https://www.mayoclinic.org/diseases-conditions/mental-illness/in-depth/mental-health/art-20046477